


That Time With the Ducks

by silveryink



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Crack, Gen, Loki is the god of mischief what did you expect, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Rubber Ducks, Tony makes a tiny appearance, but it's only for two lines so I didn't tag him as a character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-22
Updated: 2019-02-22
Packaged: 2019-11-03 21:10:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17885291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silveryink/pseuds/silveryink
Summary: In retrospect, whoever had given the actual god of mischief access to online shopping facilities had made a terrible mistake.Or, that time when Loki was a terrible roommate to the Avengers





	That Time With the Ducks

**Author's Note:**

> This story is based on [this video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f5d8pVg3Qtg) on YouTube, the minute I watched it I thought "that's something Loki would do" and this was the result

Moving into Earth was… interesting, to say the least. Humans were truly some of the most chaotic creatures in the Nine Realms. The Internet was one of their most glorious creations. It was horrifying and fascinating at the same time, interesting enough to keep oneself on their toes but equally capable of sending them into a dull stupor for hours at end. Most of what was available on the internet was a confusing mix of the two.

In retrospect, whoever had given the actual god of mischief access to online shopping facilities had made a terrible mistake.

-*- 

When Loki moved to Earth, he didn’t expect anyone to be glad about it. He couldn’t exactly blame them, though his days as some would-be conquering overlord were long since gone. New York wasn’t an easy thing to overlook, but he managed to make it up to the humans. Eventually.

Loki had often found his patience worn thin to a single thread, but it hadn’t snapped. And, really, that was the only thing that had convinced the leaders of the planet to allow him to face the consequences of invading the planet. True, he _was_ supposed to stay under the Avengers’ constant supervision for an undetermined period of time, which was unlucky considering he was the head advisor of what remained of Asgard.

Thor had vouched for him, though, and he wanted to stick to his brother’s promise. But really, they should have seen the chaos coming from a mile away.

-*- 

The Avengers weren’t too worried about the ducks in the bathroom. They did wonder why someone had ordered fifteen rubber ducks and carefully arranged them in pyramid form, but there was nothing wrong about ducks. Right?

The arrangements began to change, however. The fact that Loki was usually the first to train in the gym clued them on to the fact that this was his doing. They let it slide – after all, rubber ducks weren’t _evil_. The wedding scene he’d carefully recreated (the bridal duck even had a little _veil_ ) was actually rather lovely, and the ghost ducks from Halloween were pretty cute. The crowning ceremony was a bit weird, but they didn’t mind. It was kind of cool.

But, even they had to admit that it was starting to get pretty ridiculous.

It started with Steve walking into a shower only to find the ducks seemingly coming out from the drain. He didn’t think much about it until that fateful day when he was running late for a meeting and he saw the latest arrangement waiting for him.

 _What the_ -

-*- 

“Loki, we need to talk about the ducks.”

The trickster looked up from his book. Steve had that disapproving look on, the one that had an effect on virtually everyone except him, since he was so used to seeing it on Thor’s face. “What ducks?”

“The bathroom ducks.”

“Ah.” It was astronomically hard to keep his expression neutral. He dearly hoped his experience in managing to do so would help him now. They’d been arranged to emerge from the drains of the shower. “What about them?”

Steve looked pained. “Please stop,” he said, and now Loki knew that he wouldn’t be able to keep his laughter in for long. “I was in a rush this morning, and I couldn’t shower until I’d moved a few hundred tiny ducks.”

Yep, he was laughing.

“Loki, I’m being serious here!”

“Okay, okay, I get it,” Loki managed once he could speak again. “No more tiny ducks. You have my word.”

Steve narrowed his eyes suspiciously.

“I swear by my _seidr_ ,” Loki added.

_Time for Phase Two, then._

-*- 

The next day, Steve walked into the shower hesitantly. The floors were spotless and, more importantly, completely devoid of ducks. There was a small locker where he usually kept his gym clothes right after his workout.

He should have expected this, he thought, as he stared into the eyes of a medium-sized duck. He checked the washing machine, and, yeah, there was a duck in there too, equally large and horrifying.

He breathed in calmly. Breathed out once. Breathed in again. “LOKI!!!”

The mage materialised next to him, looking quite calm. “Is there a problem?”

“Do you think what you’re doing is funny?” Steve asked bluntly.

Loki glanced at the locker and the corners of his mouth twitched as he tried not to smile. “A little bit, yes,” he admitted. His green eyes sparkled with mischief.

Steve sighed. “Okay, I’m flying out to Wakanda to see Bucky this weekend. By the time I get back I want _all ducks gone_.”

“Fair enough,” the mage said with a long-suffering sigh. “But can I just have _one_ duck in here?”

Steve sighed. “One.”

-*- 

“You’re insane,” Tony commented as he helped Loki pump air into the large inflatable duck.

Loki grinned. “Would you say I’m… _quackers_?”

“I pretty much asked for that, didn’t I?” Tony muttered, and grinned. “Of course, I’m only doing this because you promised to let me watch Steve’s reaction.”

“Oh, of course,” Loki agreed. They both knew what a complete and utter _lie_ that was – the two of them had grown somewhat close over the time Loki had spent in the Compound, even if Tony didn’t exactly live there.

So they both waited for Steve to return after his trip to Wakanda. Thor had promised to visit that week, and collect Loki as he did so, and Loki was eagerly waiting or that. This was little more than a distraction, he told himself. He wasn’t going to miss the Avengers, not at all.

Fine, he was going to miss Peter. The teen had grown on him.

 When Steve did return, Thor was there too. Tony led them right to Steve’s door, and when the Captain opened the door, his outraged cry and the string of curse words that followed were truly impressive. Loki had to admit, this had been one of his better pranks.

It remained the team’s favourite for another year.


End file.
